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Ted Cruz

Ted Cruz Starts Using N-Word to Fund Family Getaways After Seeing It Works for Minnesota Mom

After a Minnesota woman raised half a million for slinging slurs, Ted Cruz figured he’d give it a try. His Cancun fund is already booming.…

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Bugs, Mold, and Mildew Found in Boar’s Head Plant Linked to Deadly Listeria Outbreak; Ted Cruz Proposes Sandwiches for Illegals

Recent inspections at a Boar’s Head processing plant uncovered a disturbing reality: bugs, mold, and mildew were found throughout the facility. These unsanitary conditions have been linked to a deadly listeria outbreak. The…

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Ted Cruz’s Wife Hires Hitman to Silence Donald Trump After Insults and Wild Accusations

Heidi Cruz, the wife of Senator Ted Cruz, has allegedly hired a hitman to eliminate former President Donald Trump. This sensational story comes after Trump’s infamous jabs at Heidi Cruz’s looks and his…

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Ted Cruz Demands In-depth Investigation into His “Sharknado” Twitter Mishap

Senator Ted Cruz has taken a brave step forward by demanding a comprehensive investigation into the devastating incident that left him red-faced, bewildered, and thoroughly embarrassed. The incident in question? His now-infamous retweet…

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Ted Cruz Presents: TedEx – A 20-Hour Event on Avoiding Responsibility, Cancun Not Included

Houston, TX – In a stunning display of commitment to his constituents, Senator Ted Cruz has announced the inaugural “TedEx” event, a 20-hour speech marathon where he will share his expert advice on…

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Ted Cruz Criticizes Bud Light for Being Out of Touch, Forgets He’s Ted Cruz

Houston, TX – Senator Ted Cruz, known for his recent criticism of Bud Light for being out of touch with their consumers, has come under fire for forgetting his own out-of-touch moment when…

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Recent Articles

Bill Belichick’s Girlfriend Banned From UNC Football Facility After Forgetting She Isn’t the Head Coach

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    Bill Belichick’s Girlfriend Banned From UNC Football Facility After Forgetting She Isn’t the Head Coach

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