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Politics Man Forgets Why He Walked Into Room, Becomes Mayor|Lifestyle Local Woman Claims Microwave Beep Is Passive-Aggressive|Family Area Dad Buys 14-Foot Ladder, Nothing Left to Prove|Health Surgeon General Warns Against Reheating Fish at Work|Business Pet Lizard Named Regional Sales Director in Restructuring|Entertainment Ghost Haunting Basement Just Lonely, Wants to Be in Book Club|Relationships “It’s Not You, It’s Mercury in Retrograde,” Says Breakup Text|Finance Toddler Declares Bankruptcy After Spree at Gumball Machine|Law Florida Man Wins Lawsuit Against Gravity|Tech Man Trapped in Group Text Since 2018, Sends Final SOS|Science AI Predicts Own Doom, Correctly Schedules HR Exit Interview|U.S. Emotional Support Squirrel Rejected by TSA, Starts Podcast|Work Woman on Zoom Call Wears Pajamas of Increasing Power|Education Conspiracy Theorist Discovers He’s Actually Just Bad at Puzzles|World Coffee Shop Declares Independence, Prints Own Currency| Politics Man Forgets Why He Walked Into Room, Becomes Mayor|Lifestyle Local Woman Claims Microwave Beep Is Passive-Aggressive|Family Area Dad Buys 14-Foot Ladder, Nothing Left to Prove|Health Surgeon General Warns Against Reheating Fish at Work|Business Pet Lizard Named Regional Sales Director in Restructuring|Entertainment Ghost Haunting Basement Just Lonely, Wants to Be in Book Club|Relationships “It’s Not You, It’s Mercury in Retrograde,” Says Breakup Text|Finance Toddler Declares Bankruptcy After Spree at Gumball Machine|Law Florida Man Wins Lawsuit Against Gravity|Tech Man Trapped in Group Text Since 2018, Sends Final SOS|Science AI Predicts Own Doom, Correctly Schedules HR Exit Interview|U.S. Emotional Support Squirrel Rejected by TSA, Starts Podcast|Work Woman on Zoom Call Wears Pajamas of Increasing Power|Education Conspiracy Theorist Discovers He’s Actually Just Bad at Puzzles|World Coffee Shop Declares Independence, Prints Own Currency|
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Ted Cruz

Ted Cruz Starts Using N-Word to Fund Family Getaways After Seeing It Works for Minnesota Mom

After a Minnesota woman raised half a million for slinging slurs, Ted Cruz figured he’d give it a try. His Cancun fund is…

Bugs, Mold, and Mildew Found in Boar’s Head Plant Linked to Deadly Listeria Outbreak; Ted Cruz Proposes Sandwiches for Illegals

Recent inspections at a Boar’s Head processing plant uncovered a disturbing reality: bugs, mold, and mildew were found throughout the facility. These unsanitary…

Ted Cruz’s Wife Hires Hitman to Silence Donald Trump After Insults and Wild Accusations

Heidi Cruz, the wife of Senator Ted Cruz, has allegedly hired a hitman to eliminate former President Donald Trump. This sensational story comes…

Ted Cruz Demands In-depth Investigation into His “Sharknado” Twitter Mishap

Senator Ted Cruz has taken a brave step forward by demanding a comprehensive investigation into the devastating incident that left him red-faced, bewildered,…

Ted Cruz Presents: TedEx – A 20-Hour Event on Avoiding Responsibility, Cancun Not Included

Houston, TX – In a stunning display of commitment to his constituents, Senator Ted Cruz has announced the inaugural “TedEx” event, a 20-hour…

Ted Cruz Criticizes Bud Light for Being Out of Touch, Forgets He’s Ted Cruz

Houston, TX – Senator Ted Cruz, known for his recent criticism of Bud Light for being out of touch with their consumers, has…

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Split image of Hugh Jackman with Sutton Foster (left) and with ex-wife Deborra-Lee Furness (right) at red carpet events

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Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin share a taco at a White House table, surrounded by margaritas and American flags

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White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt speaks at a podium as a breaking news banner declares the Trump administration is threatening arrests over the “T.A.C.O.” nickname

White House Warns Americans: Calling Trump “T.A.C.O.” Could Get You Arrested

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