Trump Vows to End Mail-In Voting, Says America Should “Return to Hand-Carved Wooden Ballots Like the Founders Used”

In a speech at the White House Monday, President Donald Trump promised to eliminate mail-in ballots and electronic voting machines before the 2026 midterm elections, saying the nation should instead “go back to the simple, honest system the Founding Fathers used — the wooden ballot.”

“Back then, a good man would whittle his vote out of oak, walk to town, and place it proudly in a single bucket,” Trump said. “It was beautiful. No cheating, no mailmen, no machines built by people who hate America. Just honest wood and strong arms.”

He also suggested America could “learn a few things” from ancient civilizations. “In Greece, you used a piece of pottery. You scratched the name into the clay, and everybody saw it. Total transparency. The Romans made people stand in front of the forum and say their vote out loud. Maybe we should bring that back. If you’re proud of your vote, yell it.”

Trump argued that voting was more secure in medieval times as well. “Back then, if someone tried to lie, the crowd handled it. They didn’t need Dominion machines. They had pitchforks.”

Reporters noted that federal elections are run by the states, and the president has no constitutional power to replace voting systems. Trump shrugged and replied, “The states can still count the wooden tokens. I just tell them how to do it. That’s federalism.”

Legal scholars questioned the plan but acknowledged it might appeal to voters who enjoy carving or shouting. One historian added that the Founders also voted by voice when the weather was nice, to which Trump responded, “Exactly. We should do voting outdoors. Very honest. Very sunny.”

Bring your wood, shout your vote, and may the loudest Patriot win

Donald J. Trump, President of the United States