Trump turned 78 with a military parade meant to flex global strength. Instead, it looked like a budget cosplay of 10 authoritarian…
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Donald Trump launches the “T1” smartphone and “47 Plan” service, calling it the most patriotic device ever. Features include auto-replying “WRONG” and no communication with California.…
Click to Keep ReadingFlorida police shut down a rogue Renaissance fair in a Publix parking lot after a costumed couple served turkey legs and hosted parking lot jousts.…
Click to Keep ReadingHR Department Accidentally Books Escape Room on Friday the 13th, Entire Team Still Missing
HR booked a team-building escape room on Friday the 13th. Eight employees entered. None have returned. Corporate says they’re “still learning.”…
Click to Keep ReadingIn a legislative blunder, Congress passed an infrastructure bill that inadvertently bans weekends, leaving the nation in a state of exhausted confusion.…
Click to Keep ReadingBrian Wilson, Beach Boys co-founder, dies after the chaos of LA’s recent riots overwhelms his fragile harmonic equilibrium…
Click to Keep ReadingTrump unveils “TruthTrade,” a MAGA-exclusive investing app that syncs with his social media posts and features Marjorie Taylor Greene giving stock tips from a throne…
Click to Keep ReadingAfter a failed inspection, Trump rebrands food safety, blames woke hand soap agenda, and launches his own “T for Trump” health grade…
Click to Keep ReadingAfter a 4-0 loss to Switzerland and four straight defeats, the U.S. Men’s National Team is reportedly asking FIFA if it can still host the 2026 World Cup without playing.…
Click to Keep ReadingHulk Hogan is leading a beer-fueled bid to rescue Hooters from bankruptcy, promising to revive the brand with patriotism, wings, and flex appeal.…
Click to Keep ReadingPresident Trump says he’s restoring military base names honoring Confederate officers to “keep the winning streak alive.” Critics say he’s honoring losers to own the libs.…
Click to Keep ReadingAmerica’s Fast Food Workers Demand Paid Nap Time, Citing “Extreme Button Pushing Fatigue”
The National Fast Food Workers Union is demanding 20-minute nap breaks for “button fatigue,” prompting Burger King and Wendy’s to race for solutions while OSHA updates its workplace guidelines.…
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Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost.
Nothing can now be believed which is seen in a newspaper the media. Truth itself becomes suspicious by being put into that polluted vehicle.
-Thomas Jefferson