Karen Vandriver, a resident of suburban California, has sued the popular spice company McCormick over their cayenne red pepper being too spicy.…
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WACO, TX – In a stunning display of rage, former President Donald Trump reportedly threw a tub of ice cream against the window of his private airplane, Trump Force One, during a campaign rally in Waco, Texas. The incident was said to have been triggered…
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MOSOW – Russia has announced that it has transferred all of their fast food supplies of American-based restaurants from its country to Ukraine. The move was made in an apparent bid to make Ukrainian soldiers and civilians less effective in resisting the Russian invasion. Sources…
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Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene has voiced her outrage over the treatment of the January 6 defendants, claiming that they are being treated like criminals in a jail. “They’re treating these people like they’re actual criminals,” said Greene in a press conference on Thursday. “It’s ridiculous!…
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Republican lawmakers have vowed to limit the government’s intrusion into citizens’ lives, as long as those citizens’ choices align with the conservative agenda. “We believe in limited government, except when it comes to telling people what to do,” said Represenitive Lauren Boebert. “As long as…
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SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA – In a desperate attempt to address the plummeting birth rates in the country, the South Korean government has turned to a rather unconventional solution: paying Nick Cannon to impregnate women. The famous rapper and television personality, who has fathered many children…
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In a bizarre turn of events, Wheel of Fortune host Pat Sajak has been caught on camera tackling contestant Frank to the ground, just moments after he solved the final puzzle and won a brand new car. As Frank excitedly jumped up and down and…
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A Taylor Swift concert turned into a nightmare for one fan last night, as she waited for two hours for a second encore that never occurred. Samantha Johnson, 21, had been looking forward to the concert for months, and had splurged on VIP tickets in…
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Former President Donald Trump has reportedly paid Fox News host Tucker Carlson hush money to stop defending him on his show. According to sources with knowledge of the matter, Trump’s legal team approached Carlson with a six-figure offer to keep quiet about the ex-president’s legal…
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New York City – Former President Donald Trump has announced his latest business venture – a luxury jail under the Trump brand. The jail, set to open later this year, will feature gold-plated cells, five-star dining options, and a “Trump Spa and Wellness Center” for…
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In a stunning victory for prudishness and censorship, a conservative Florida school board has voted to put pants on a Renaissance statue after parents complained about an art lesson featuring the iconic nude sculpture by Michelangelo. The statue, which depicts the Biblical figure David, has…
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Former President Barack Obama was arrested yesterday in Hawaii for attempting to smuggle an excessive number of pineapples off the island. According to witnesses, Obama was caught red-handed by customs officials trying to board a plane with over 20 pineapples in his carry-on luggage. Conservatives…
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Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost.
Nothing can now be believed which is seen in a newspaper the media. Truth itself becomes suspicious by being put into that polluted vehicle.
-Thomas Jefferson