San Francisco, CA — As iconic fashion outlets, tech stores, and luxury brands continue their exodus from San Francisco’s Union Square, a…
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Former Fox News host Tucker Carlson, never one to shy away from hard-hitting journalism, has announced an exclusive interview with none other than the elusive Sasquatch, also known as Bigfoot, to discuss rumors about former President Barack Obama’s secret wilderness retreat. The interview, scheduled to…
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United Airlines announced that its recent nationwide ground stop was caused by someone forgetting to switch off “Airplane Mode” on the central computer system. Thousands of passengers were stranded for hours, but United assured them it was all just a “minor technical difficulty” with a…
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A vocal group of activists known as “Inclusivi-TEA” have launched a campaign demanding that the legendary Burning Man festival undergo a major rebrand to “Burning Person” in the spirit of inclusivity and gender neutrality. The group argues that the name “Burning Man” reinforces a patriarchal…
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Burning Man, the festival that turns the Black Rock Desert into a temporary city of art, techno-music, and dubious hygiene, came to an end last week. Drone footage showed thousands of vehicles painstakingly exiting the area through thick mud. However, in true Burning Man fashion,…
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Former President Donald Trump and his family have officially invaded the fashion industry with a line of t-shirts that has both style critics and political pundits bewildered. Branded as “TrumpShots,” these shirts feature a stylized mugshot of the former President and boldly proclaim “Never Surrender,”…
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Washington, D.C.— Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) is once again calling out Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) for his alleged “forgetfulness,” describing him as “unfit for office.” This comes after Greene’s own mesmerizing display of memory lapses while on the stand discussing the January…
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Giuliani Goes from Election Litigator to Graphology Critic After making headlines for legal crusades questioning the validity of recent elections, Rudy Giuliani is back in the spotlight. This time, he’s not wielding lawsuits but rather wielding claims about Georgia election workers faking their handwriting on…
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Staten Island, NY — Staten Island is not just aiming to secede from New York City, but it also plans to become its own independent nation-state. The borough, long known for its unique blend of New York toughness and suburban serenity, has decided it’s high…
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Former publicists for Donald Trump—John Barron, John Miller, Carolin Gallego, and David Dennison—held a joint press conference to express their outrage over reports that Joe Biden allegedly used pseudonyms while serving as Vice President under Barack Obama. “If this is true, it’s a total disgrace,”…
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WASHINGTON D.C.— Former President Donald Trump announced yesterday that he plans to appeal the trial date set for his federal election case. Legal experts were astonished at his grounds for appeal, however, as Trump is requesting that the trial be moved to “infinity plus one”…
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Detroit, MI – Rap artist Eminem has served entrepreneur Vivek Ramaswamy with a cease-and-desist letter. But this isn’t your typical copyright dispute: Eminem claims that the only reason for the legal action is Ramaswamy’s “egregious lack of flow.” The cease-and-desist letter reads, in part: “Your…
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Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost.
Nothing can now be believed which is seen in a newspaper the media. Truth itself becomes suspicious by being put into that polluted vehicle.
-Thomas Jefferson