NEED TO KNOW
- Kermit the Frog gave a heartfelt speech at the University of Maryland’s 2025 commencement ceremony.
- Trump signed an executive order hours later to eliminate PBS funding, calling Kermit “a puppet of the liberal arts.”
- Despite this, Kermit encouraged graduates to “leap together,” and led them in a group rendition of “Rainbow Connection.”
From Tadpole to Target: Kermit Inspires Graduates, Alarms Republicans
Wearing a custom cap and gown, Kermit the Frog brought laughter and tears to the University of Maryland’s Class of 2025 on Thursday, urging students to embrace community, creativity, and personal growth. He spoke of losing his tail, finding his people, and the importance of leaping together — all of which immediately triggered a House Oversight hearing on the dangers of anthropomorphic amphibians with public broadcasting influence.
“Life is not a solo act,” Kermit told the sea of beaming students. “It’s a messy, delightful ensemble.” Moments later, the Trump administration released a memo labeling ensemble thinking as “Marxist-adjacent.”
Trump Calls PBS a “Deep State Puppet Show”
In a move totally unrelated to Kermit’s gentle optimism and inspirational tadpole references, President Donald Trump signed an executive order to eliminate federal funding for PBS and NPR within hours of the frog’s final bow.
“Frankly, I’ve always been suspicious of frogs in tuxedos,” Trump said. “He’s got the hand of Jim Henson up his back, and you’re telling me that’s not suspicious? Very suspicious. Not American.”
The executive order, titled Operation Muppet Freeze, calls for immediate audits of all puppetry-related programming and proposes that future children’s shows include “stronger male role models like Elon Musk or Matt Gaetz.”
When asked for clarification, Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt said, “This administration believes in human-led narratives, not felt-based indoctrination.”
Netflix Welcomes Sesame Street As It Moves From PBS
Kermit’s green-tinted address comes just as his Muppet family finds new digital real estate. With PBS funding in question, Sesame Street is officially moving to Netflix — likely between a true-crime docuseries about Lego cults and a stand-up special from the TikTok goat who makes coffee.
Still, Kermit struck a hopeful tone, even acknowledging he may be distant cousins with the school mascot Testudo the turtle. “It’s not easy being green,” he said, “but it’s a lot easier than being a senator from Texas.”
Quote of the Moment
I came here to inspire students, not spark a war on frogs
Kermit the Frog, while gripping his tiny diploma
