Notification
Search
Have an existing account?
Sign In
All the Latest in Business
HR Department Accidentally Books Escape Room on Friday the 13th, Entire Team Still Missing
HR booked a team-building escape room on Friday the 13th. Eight employees entered. None have returned. Corporate says they’re “still learning.”
Hulk Hogan Drops the Elbow on Hooters Bankruptcy with Beer-Soaked Rescue Plan
Hulk Hogan is leading a beer-fueled bid to rescue Hooters from bankruptcy, promising to revive the brand with patriotism, wings, and flex appeal.
America’s Fast Food Workers Demand Paid Nap Time, Citing “Extreme Button Pushing Fatigue”
The National Fast Food Workers Union is demanding 20-minute nap breaks for “button fatigue,” prompting Burger King and Wendy’s to race for solutions while OSHA updates its workplace guidelines.
Jobs Report Surprises Experts: Most Hires Were Actually AI Bots Filling Out Their Own W-2s
The US economy’s latest jobs report looks great, until you realize most new hires are artificial intelligence. As Roombas unionize and LinkedIn fills up with suspiciously tidy bots, America wonders—should we start learning…
Hooters Blames Restaurant Closures On America’s Shrinking Appetite for Awkward Family Dinners
Hooters closes dozens of locations, blaming America’s waning appetite for forced family outings. The chain pivots to a new franchise model and virtual awkwardness, promising spicy wings without the side of social anxiety.
Head & Shoulders Launches “Knees & Toes” Body Wash
Head & Shoulders shocks the world by launching “Knees & Toes” body wash, raising questions—and eyebrows—about which body part gets a product next.
Will Trump’s iPhone Tariff Make You Pay $3,500 to Autocorrect “Covfefe”?
Trump threatens Apple with tariffs unless it builds iPhones in America, proving once again he understands manufacturing the same way toddlers understand cloud storage.
Trump Spokeswoman Says It’s “Absurd” to Think He’s Profiting From Presidency, Immediately Sells $95 Golf Towels
Trump’s spokeswoman says it’s absurd to think he’s profiting off the presidency, then immediately sells $95 towels and probably your dignity.
Walmart Faces Boycott Over DEI Rollbacks, Still Somehow Sells 11 Million Pool Noodles
Boycotters demand equity from Walmart, but still rely on it for shampoo, socks, and existential dread.
Recent Articles
