President Trump replaces Jerome Powell with Dale “Big Money” Jenkins, a Florida scratch-off legend whose…
A concerned (and slightly aroused) reader writes in after discovering her neighbor’s solo sessions are……
Trump announces Patriot missile deal for Ukraine, confusing everyone including himself. “It’s called tough love…
Vice President JD Vance left a secret Murdoch-Fox executive meeting soaked in elk blood and…
After years of insults, Ted Cruz and his wife Heidi laughed it off over filet…
Trump launches $10B lawsuit against WSJ over Epstein birthday art, says boobs “look nothing like…
President Trump denies ever drawing anything—even as signed sketches of suspiciously shapely skylines continue selling…
Trump admits he doesn’t know how to play chess despite years of MAGA fans insisting…
President Trump denies any connection to Epstein, insisting his interest in teen beauty pageants is…
Trump revamps Alcatraz as a beachfront federal facility “just in case,” sparking speculation it may…
President Trump files a lawsuit against Coca-Cola, claiming they broke a verbal agreement to replace…
President Trump’s legs have swelled from an apparent overdose of “American pride,” prompting medics to…
In a surprise move, President Trump named Sean “Diddy” Combs as Special Prosecutor to handle…
Trump defunds PBS and NPR, declares war on puppet-based learning. Big Bird to retrain as…
After a Trump Truth Social post praising the 1886 Coca-Cola recipe, the soda giant announces…
Trump says there are zero Epstein clients, zero inflation, and zero illegal crossings. “That’s not…
Chicago Sky announces Angel Reese will now play all five positions after another dominant performance,…
Trump calls Epstein story a Democrat hoax, declares he no longer wants the support of…
Trump shocked religious leaders at a White House luncheon by proclaiming himself the 13th Apostle,…
Trump calls Powell’s $2.5B Fed remodel a fireable offense, then demands a gold toilet and…
Trump orders the destruction of 500 tons of emergency food. USAID is gone, replaced by…
After ranting about Epstein all weekend, Charlie Kirk suddenly ends discussion following a phone call…
Ghislaine Maxwell offers to testify on Epstein’s clients, but GOP leaders table the issue to…
Trump blames Biden for not locating Obama’s birth certificate, citing deep state filing cabinets and…
Trump shocks the world, declaring Epstein imaginary and blaming 5G towers, windmills, and beer for…
Elmo’s wholesome X account was hijacked by a rogue user spewing hate. Sources now blame…
After fans booed President Trump at the FIFA Club World Cup Final, he responded by…
The honeymoon is over, and so is marital peace, after one couple introduces a third…
Vice President JD Vance’s strange Disneyland jog has been classified as a new species of…
Jennifer Aniston’s new romance takes an unexpected turn as she reportedly believes she’s a Golden…
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