Tag: JD Vance

Donald Trump walking outside in a navy suit and red tie
World

Trump Threatens to Bomb Nobel Peace Prize Committee Until They ‘See Peace His Way’

After losing the Nobel Peace Prize, Trump vows “beautiful, precision-style diplomacy” against Norway. Officials call…

4 Min Read
Large house engulfed in flames and heavy black smoke on Edisto Beach, South Carolina
U.S.

Trump Offers ‘Thoughts and Flares’ After Judge’s Home Burns Down

White House officials say “spontaneous combustion” can occur when freedom meets judicial resistance. Critics call…

4 Min Read
U.S. Capitol building with a “Sorry We’re Closed” sign during government shutdown
Politics

Party of Christian Values Confirms: Jesus Would Have Let Him Die

Republicans say Jesus healed the sick for free, but that was before government waste. Now,…

3 Min Read
Hakeem Jeffries and Chuck Schumer speaking outside while Jeffries wears a sombrero and mustache
Politics

 Is It Racist or Just Republican? Vance Unsure Why AI Sombrero Meme Upset Jeffries

Vance calls Trump’s AI sombrero meme “just a joke” as Jeffries demands respect, proving once…

4 Min Read
President Donald Trump with large scissors cutting a ribbon at a staged event.
U.S.

White House Insists Trump Not Missing, Just Busy Cutting Epstein Island Ribbon for ‘Trump Youth Jobs Program’

Trump’s disappearance wasn’t a health scare — it was a ribbon-cutting ceremony for the new…

3 Min Read
President Donald Trump speaks at the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office.
Politics

Not a Dictator, Trump Clarifies, “Just a Guy With Excellent Common Sense About Martial Law”

Trump swears he’s not a dictator, just a man with flawless instincts about martial law,…

3 Min Read
Donald Trump and Volodymyr Zelensky meeting in the Oval Office
Politics

Zelensky Thanks Trump Four Times in a Row Just to Avoid Provoking JD Vance Again

After a tense February exchange, Zelensky uses “gratitude strategy” while staff distract JD Vance with…

3 Min Read
Donald Trump sits at Oval Office desk with Rupert Murdoch and executives
Politics

JD Vance Emerges from Secret Murdoch Meeting Covered in Elk Blood, Claims It Was ‘Symbolic’

Vice President JD Vance left a secret Murdoch-Fox executive meeting soaked in elk blood and…

3 Min Read
Vice President JD Vance mid-jog at Disneyland, surrounded by confused bystanders
Family

Biologists Classify JD Vance’s Jog as New Species of Flightless Flail

Vice President JD Vance’s strange Disneyland jog has been classified as a new species of…

3 Min Read
JD Vance and Donald Trump walk through the Capitol moments after megabill passes
Politics

Congress Slips Five Hidden Provisions into Trump’s Megabill While Nobody Was Looking

Tucked deep inside the 1,123-page Trump megabill are five ridiculous policies involving Reagan, dubstep, and…

3 Min Read
Donald Trump and JD Vance standing outside, both wearing red ties
Politics

Vance Casts Tie-Breaker, Immediately Asks What He Voted On

Vice President JD Vance broke the Senate tie on Trump’s megabill, then asked what the…

3 Min Read
Close-up of a bald man with a trimmed beard and a slightly unsettling smile in front of a bright blue background
Politics

U.S. Customs Denies Entry to Tourist for Possessing Unlicensed Satire of JD Vance

A Norwegian tourist says he was deported for a meme mocking JD Vance. Homeland Security…

3 Min Read