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Tag: Federal Reserve
Economists Confirm: 90% of Americans Now Identify as ‘Between Paychecks’
Economists say “broke” is no longer a circumstance, it’s an identity. Treasury officials now classify…
Federal Reserve Cuts Rates, Americans Celebrate by Not Buying Anything Anyway
Wall Street cheered, Main Street yawned. A quarter-point rate cut can’t move a housing market…
Jerome Powell Reportedly Hiding in Utility Closet as Trump Circles Fed With Steak Knife
Fed Chair Jerome Powell reportedly hiding in closet as Trump storms the building demanding rate…
Trump Points at Random Blueprint, Demands Powell Justify Every Dollar Spent on a Staircase
During a visit to the Fed headquarters, Trump questioned the cost of a staircase and…
Powell Yells “Just Close the F*cking Door” as GOP Refers Him for Crimes He Didn’t Commit Fast Enough
After a criminal referral over luxury renovations, Fed Chair Jerome Powell asks the real question:…
Trump Nominates Florida Scratch-Off Legend to Run the Fed: ‘He’s Got the Golden Fingernail’
President Trump replaces Jerome Powell with Dale “Big Money” Jenkins, a Florida scratch-off legend whose…
Trump Says Powell’s Office Upgrade Is ‘Fireable Offense’ — Also Demands Gold Toilet in White House Bathrooms
Trump calls Powell’s $2.5B Fed remodel a fireable offense, then demands a gold toilet and…
Jerome Powell Considers Retirement After Dismal Amazon Prime Day Sales
After a report showed a 41% drop in Prime Day sales, Jerome Powell blamed the…
Markets Spooked as Trump Threatens to Replace Powell With Guy in MAGA Hard Hat Who Once Sold Him a Patio
Donald Trump criticized his own Fed pick Jerome Powell for not cutting interest rates, then…
Trump to Walmart: Eat the Tariffs, Don’t Raise Prices or Else
Trump warned Walmart not to blame his tariffs for price hikes, insisting the company should…
Job Growth Epidemic: Fed Needs to Mask Booming Economy Before It’s a Pandemic
The latest job figures released by the Bureau of Labor Statistics have caused widespread panic…
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