‘I Am Like Totally NOT Taking Drugs,’ Says Musk, While Blinking in Morse Code
Elon Musk says he’s “NOT taking drugs,” despite black eye, bizarre behavior, and a farewell appearance that looked like an intergalactic exit interview.…
DOGE Aims to Save Taxpayers, Trump and Musk Spend It on Oval Office Bling
Trump and Musk shut down the budget-saving DOGE program and immediately brainstorm gold upgrades for the Oval Office, because irony is tax-deductible.…
Second Court Blocks Trump’s Tariffs, Citing Law, Logic, and Lack of Emergency
A second federal court has blocked Donald Trump’s unilateral tariffs, ruling the IEEPA can’t be used just because Trump “feels like it’s a…
Trump Gives Putin Ultimatum on Ukraine, Then Invites Him to White House for T.A.C.O. Tuesday
Donald Trump gave Vladimir Putin two weeks to take action on Ukraine, then invited him to the White House for a diplomatic lunch…
White House Warns Americans: Calling Trump “T.A.C.O.” Could Get You Arrested
White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt warned that referring to Donald Trump as “T.A.C.O.”, Trump Always Chickens Out, may lead to criminal charges.…
Taco Bell Trolls Trump with New Meal #47: Three Chicken Tacos in Doritos Shells
Taco Bell’s new Meal #47, featuring three chicken tacos in Doritos shells, is fueling rumors that the brand is trolling Trump over the…
Trump Defends Tariff Policy, Declares Himself King of Taco Tuesday
Trump dismissed Wall Street’s “TACO” nickname by bragging about his tariffs and launching into a passionate defense of Taco Tuesday, claiming it’s the…
Trump Says He’ll ‘Take a Look’ at Pardoning Men Who Took a Look at Kidnapping Governor
President Trump raised eyebrows again by saying he’ll “take a look” at pardoning the men convicted of plotting to kidnap Michigan Governor Gretchen…
Musk Furious Trump’s “Big, Beautiful Bill” Threatens Fake Government Agency He Made Up
Elon Musk lashes out at Trump’s latest spending bill, claiming it undermines his pet agency DOGE — which critics say mostly exists to…
Trump Wishes America a “Happy Memorial Day” by Screaming at Everyone, Including Ghosts
Trump posted a Memorial Day message so intense it made fireworks seem subtle. God bless the caps lock key.…
