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Politics

Fulton County DA Charges Trump for Weight Misrepresentation After Surrender; Weight Reported as 215 Pounds

Last updated: August 26, 2023 2:42 PM CT

ATLANTA, GA – As former President Donald Trump turned himself in to Fulton County authorities, he didn’t just bring legal concerns to the table. In an unexpected twist, Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis has tacked on an additional charge related to what experts are calling a “massive misrepresentation of weight” on Trump’s self-reported intake form upon entering the Fulton County Prison.

The charge, known colloquially as the “Inaccurate Incarceration Weight Declaration,” comes amidst a backdrop of more serious allegations surrounding Trump’s political actions. Apparently, Trump boldly declared his weight to be a modest 215 pounds on the entry form, sending a ripple of bemusement throughout the Prison staff and sparking heated debates on the accuracy of scales.

“We can’t ignore the scale of this deception,” DA Willis quipped with a sly grin during a press conference. “While we take all charges seriously, including the more conventional ones, we also have a duty to uphold the integrity of prison weight records.”

Legal experts are grappling with the novelty of this charge, as it introduces a quirky new dimension to the legal landscape. “It’s a novel legal strategy, to say the least,” remarked legal analyst Rebecca Goodman. “We’re delving into uncharted territory here.”

Social media platforms once again had a field day, with memes and posts flooding timelines that playfully depicted everyday objects and animals that collectively weighed around 215 pounds. #WeightGate trended on Twitter, uniting people from diverse backgrounds to chime in on this curious development.

Trump himself took to Twitter to respond to the charge, writing, “They’re after me for having the most tremendous weight – a true heavyweight, some say the heaviest ever in history. This is a setup by the biased weighing scale cartel!”

As the legal machinery gears up for an unusual courtroom showdown, the nation watches with a mix of amusement and bewilderment. Observers are left pondering whether inaccurately stating one’s weight could genuinely lead to criminal charges and whether the justice system might be stepping on a few scales of its own.

In an era where headlines continually outdo each other in surrealism, one thing remains certain: reality often trumps fiction. So whether you’re siding with #WeightGate or just relishing the spectacle from a distance, remember that in the realm of satire, the line between absurdity and reality can be as weighty as an elephant-sized meme – or, say, about 215 pounds.

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