Key Takeaways
- Texas legislators pass a controversial law defining pi as exactly 3.00, citing a literal interpretation of the Bible.
- Critics warn the move undermines education and scientific progress in the state.
- Engineers and mathematicians are scrambling to adjust, while memes flood the internet.
In a decision that has left mathematicians and scientists bewildered, the Texas legislature has officially redefined the mathematical constant pi as 3.00. Citing a passage from the Bible’s First Book of Kings, lawmakers argue that the change aligns with divine truth and reflects the state’s commitment to traditional values.
“Why complicate things with decimal places?” said State Senator Bill Rounds (R-Texas) during the announcement. “The Good Book tells us the value of pi is 3. That’s good enough for Texas.”
The Bible as a Measuring Tape
The new law references a verse from 1 Kings 7:23, which describes the dimensions of a circular basin constructed for Solomon’s temple. The passage indicates that the basin was 10 cubits across and 30 cubits in circumference, which, according to literal interpretation, places pi at 3.
Supporters of the law argue that the change is about more than just math—it’s about reaffirming faith. “This is about standing up for Biblical truth in a world increasingly hostile to traditional values,” Rounds said. “If schools can teach theories, they can teach what’s in the Bible too.”
Chaos in Classrooms and Boardrooms
The decision has thrown Texas’s education system and industries reliant on mathematics into turmoil. Engineers worry about the impact on construction and design, while teachers are scrambling to rewrite lesson plans. “How do I explain this to students?” asked one Dallas-area geometry teacher. “Math is supposed to be objective. Now I have to pretend circles are squares.”
Meanwhile, Texas-based companies are already feeling the effects. “We build airplanes, not prayer books,” said one frustrated aerospace engineer. “If pi is 3.00, your jet’s not going to land where you think it will.”
National Reaction and Internet Frenzy
The move has drawn sharp criticism from across the nation. Scientists have condemned the decision as an assault on education and science, while legal experts question its constitutionality. However, social media users have taken a more lighthearted approach, flooding the internet with memes. One popular post features a pie with the caption, “Texas: Where even dessert is wrong.”
Late-night comedians have also seized the opportunity. “Texas has simplified math!” joked one talk show host. “Next up, gravity’s optional.”
What’s Next for Texas Math?
Despite the backlash, Texas lawmakers appear steadfast. Some have hinted at future revisions to other constants. “We’ve got our eye on the speed of light next,” one representative quipped.
For now, Texans will live in a state where math bends to Biblical interpretation. Whether this sparks a nationwide trend or remains a uniquely Texan phenomenon, one thing is clear: pi may never feel the same again.
