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Man Forgets Why He Walked Into Room, Becomes Mayor| Local Woman Claims Microwave Beep Is Passive-Aggressive| Area Dad Buys 14-Foot Ladder, Nothing Left to Prove| Surgeon General Warns Against Reheating Fish at Work| Pet Lizard Named Regional Sales Director in Restructuring| Ghost Haunting Basement Just Lonely, Wants to Be in Book Club| “It’s Not You, It’s Mercury in Retrograde,” Says Breakup Text| Toddler Declares Bankruptcy After Spree at Gumball Machine| Florida Man Wins Lawsuit Against Gravity| Man Trapped in Group Text Since 2018, Sends Final SOS| AI Predicts Own Doom, Correctly Schedules HR Exit Interview| Emotional Support Squirrel Rejected by TSA, Starts Podcast| Woman on Zoom Call Wears Pajamas of Increasing Power| Conspiracy Theorist Discovers He’s Actually Just Bad at Puzzles| Coffee Shop Declares Independence, Prints Own Currency Man Forgets Why He Walked Into Room, Becomes Mayor| Local Woman Claims Microwave Beep Is Passive-Aggressive| Area Dad Buys 14-Foot Ladder, Nothing Left to Prove| Surgeon General Warns Against Reheating Fish at Work| Pet Lizard Named Regional Sales Director in Restructuring| Ghost Haunting Basement Just Lonely, Wants to Be in Book Club| “It’s Not You, It’s Mercury in Retrograde,” Says Breakup Text| Toddler Declares Bankruptcy After Spree at Gumball Machine| Florida Man Wins Lawsuit Against Gravity| Man Trapped in Group Text Since 2018, Sends Final SOS| AI Predicts Own Doom, Correctly Schedules HR Exit Interview| Emotional Support Squirrel Rejected by TSA, Starts Podcast| Woman on Zoom Call Wears Pajamas of Increasing Power| Conspiracy Theorist Discovers He’s Actually Just Bad at Puzzles| Coffee Shop Declares Independence, Prints Own Currency
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World - Page 4

Haitian Migrants Accused of Eating Pets in Springfield

In what seems like a storyline from an over-the-top tabloid, Springfield, Ohio, has become the center of a controversial and unsettling rumor: that Haitian migrants in the community are eating pets. The accusation…

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Gone in ’60 Minutes’, Rebranding as ’60 Seconds’ to Attract Younger Viewers

In a bold move to appeal to younger generations with a shorter attention span, the popular newsmagazine “60 Minutes” is set to be rebranded as “60 Seconds”. The new format will condense the…

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Recently Released from Prison, Andrew Tate “Fans” Eager for Him to Berate Them Again for only $49.99 a Month

Controversial internet personality Andrew Tate has been released from prison and placed on house arrest. The news has been met with an outpouring of support from hundreds of teenage boys and young men…

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Russia is Sending Fast Food to Ukraine in Hopes of Making them Fat and Lazy in Latest War Efforts

MOSOW – Russia has announced that it has transferred all of their fast food supplies of American-based restaurants from its country to Ukraine. The move was made in an apparent bid to make…

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South Korea to Pay Nick Cannon to Help Increase Birth Rates in Country

SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA – In a desperate attempt to address the plummeting birth rates in the country, the South Korean government has turned to a rather unconventional solution: paying Nick Cannon to impregnate…

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