Trump Defends Qatari Jet as “Temporary Air Force One,” Compares It to Trojan Horse, But for Freedom
What You Need to Know • Trump confirmed the U.S. will accept a $400 million Boeing 747-8 from Qatar’s royal family • He…
North Koreans Add Trump to “Fearless Leader” Photo Wall, Say His Vibe Just Fits
Trump joins Xi, Putin, and Kim on North Korea’s wall of strongmen. Critics call it chilling. MAGA calls it presidential stagecraft.…
Trump Agrees to Accept Luxury Jet From Qatar, Cites “Deep National Need for Mid-Air Gold Plating”
Trump confirms he’ll accept a luxury jet from Qatar. He says it’s for national duty, critics say it’s just a flying suite named…
Trump Ends His Own Tariffs, Declares Victory
Trump rolls back tariffs he added, triggering MAGA celebration over the brilliant move of reversing the thing he did last week.…
White Smoke Signals New Pope, Vatican Later Clarifies It Was Just the Epstein Client List Being Incinerated
Vatican confirms the white smoke seen over the Sistine Chapel wasn’t for a new pope, but rather the incineration of the Epstein client…
Elon Musk Offers to Father the Future: Win a Chance to Be Impregnated by the Billionaire—In Space
Because when it comes to saving humanity, Musk says it's time to shoot for the stars... literally.…
New Study Finds 99% of Social Media Arguments Would Solve World Peace If Only Conducted in Person
Groundbreaking research shows that the path to world peace may simply involve stepping away from the keyboard.…
Lebanon’s Health Ministry Reports Over 100 Wounded by Exploding Devices in Alleged “Jewish Space Laser” Attack
Lebanon’s health ministry has confirmed one fatality and over 100 injuries after several electronic devices exploded in a second wave of mysterious attacks.…
Haitian Migrants Accused of Eating Pets in Springfield
In what seems like a storyline from an over-the-top tabloid, Springfield, Ohio, has become the center of a controversial and unsettling rumor: that…
Putin Endorses Kamala Harris, Pinky Swears He’s Not Lying About It
Russian President Vladimir Putin has publicly endorsed U.S. Vice President Kamala Harris for the 2024 election. But that’s not the strangest part—Putin claims…
