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All the Latest in World
Donald Trump and Volodymyr Zelensky meeting in the Oval Office
Donald Trump

Trump Praises Zelensky’s “Very Classy Black Suit,” Says War Could Have Ended Months Ago “If He Dressed Like This Sooner”

Trump says Ukraine war could end with better fashion choices as Zelensky rolls his eyes in the Oval Office.

3 Min Read
Melania Trump standing in front of American flags
Melania Trump

Melania Praised for Not Plagiarizing Michelle Obama, Even Though the Letter Still Sounds Like a Beauty Pageant Answer

Experts stunned after First Lady writes something without "borrowing" from Michelle Obama

3 Min Read
Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky pointing during a press conference
Donald Trump

After Putin Summit, Trump Invites Zelenskyy to D.C. for “Peace Meeting” — Zelenskyy Responds: “Sure, But Make It Maui.”

After Alaska talks with Putin, Trump moves on to “step two” and immediately hits a Hawaiian roadblock.

4 Min Read
B-2 bomber and fighter jets fly over airbase during Trump and Putin arrival
Alaska summit

Trump Orders Stealth Bomber to “Turn Off the Stealth” So Putin Can Appreciate How Cool It Looks

Alaska summit begins with bomber flyover and polite Russian nod

4 Min Read
Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump facing each other during a meeting.
Alaska summit

Putin Expected to Let Trump ‘Win’ First Round of Moose Racing to Boost Morale

Leaders chase a feel-good photo finish while real talks wait at the gate.

4 Min Read
French President Emmanuel Macron and First Lady Brigitte Macron standing in front of flags
Brigitte Macron

Brigitte Macron Sues Candace Owens, Candace Responds: ‘Wouldn’t Be the First Frenchman in Drag to Slap Me’

After Brigitte Macron sued Candace Owens for defamation, Owens clapped back with constitutional rage and couture insults.

3 Min Read
Chinese President Xi Jinping at the National People’s Congress
China Exit Ban

Pay Up or Stay Forever: Trump Strikes ‘Freedom Tariff’ Deal with China

China unveils Staycation Plus™, offering detained Americans continental breakfast, soft pillows, and an optional exit tariff. Trump calls it a “great trade.”

3 Min Read
Silhouetted image of Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin walking side-by-side
Donald Trump

Trump Offers Missiles to Ukraine, Says “Sometimes You Gotta Gaslight Both Sides”

Trump announces Patriot missile deal for Ukraine, confusing everyone including himself. “It’s called tough love — and arms dealing,” he says.

3 Min Read
Pile of emergency food rations awaiting destruction under Trump administration order
Donald Trump

Trump Administration to Burn Emergency Rations, Cites Risk of ‘Feeding Future Terrorists With Good American Biscuits’

Trump orders the destruction of 500 tons of emergency food. USAID is gone, replaced by a biscuit bonfire and a new food czar named Brad who once managed a Taco Bell.

3 Min Read
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