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All the Latest in Politics
Trump Exposes Deep State, Installs Even Deeper State ‘With Better Loyalty, Better Hats’
Trump claims victory over the Deep State and replaces it with something murkier, crawlier, and slightly damper — the Deeper State.
Trump Says Windmills Cause Tornadoes: “You Spin Something That Big, What Do You Expect?”
Trump blames wind turbines for causing tornadoes, migraines, and “atmospheric disrespect,” promises to return to energy sources that don’t “spin or swirl.”
Joe Rogan Endorses Hunter Biden for 2028, Says America Ready for a President Who’s ‘Already Hit Rock Bottom’
Joe Rogan throws his weight behind Hunter Biden for 2028, calling him scandal-proof and “America’s most transparent crack philosopher.”
Trump Flees Epstein Questions, Lands in Scotland to Negotiate Golf Cart Tariff With EU
Trump lands in Scotland to escape Epstein questions and discuss golf cart tariffs with confused EU officials.
Congress To Quietly Ban Hemp After Realizing It Helps People Feel Better Without Lobbyists
Congress moves to ban hemp products after discovering they relieve stress without major lobbying.
Trump Points at Random Blueprint, Demands Powell Justify Every Dollar Spent on a Staircase
During a visit to the Fed headquarters, Trump questioned the cost of a staircase and demanded Jerome Powell explain its financial conduct.
White House Labels South Park ‘Leftist Terror Cell,’ Orders DHS to Monitor Kenny
The Trump White House has labeled “South Park” a “leftist terror cell” after a brutal season premiere and filed a $5 billion lawsuit seeking both cash and Satanic conjugal rights.
Gabbard Refers Obama for ‘Conspiracy to Collude With Collusion’ in Time-Looping Indictment
Tulsi Gabbard has referred Obama to the DOJ for allegedly creating the Russia collusion narrative before it happened. Trump celebrated with a deepfake and a dance.
Powell Yells “Just Close the F*cking Door” as GOP Refers Him for Crimes He Didn’t Commit Fast Enough
After a criminal referral over luxury renovations, Fed Chair Jerome Powell asks the real question: Why is this damn door always open?
