Iran’s Nuclear Scientists File Restraining Order Against Donald Trump’s Ego
Trump says he’ll strike Iran again if it rebuilds its nuclear program. Iran’s scientists respond with a legal motion to keep his ego…
U.S. Customs Denies Entry to Tourist for Possessing Unlicensed Satire of JD Vance
A Norwegian tourist says he was deported for a meme mocking JD Vance. Homeland Security denies it, but the image is still too…
Lady Liberty Wears Niqab After Learning a Muslim Might Run NYC
Zohran Mamdani wins NYC’s Democratic primary, and the right loses it like he personally moonwalked into Ground Zero.…
Cuomo Promises to “Rebuild Trust” But Accidentally Says “Thrust” During Speech
Andrew Cuomo accidentally promised to “rebuild thrust” instead of trust during a campaign speech, reigniting mockery over his past scandals and derailing his…
Democrats Furious Trump Said “F#*k” Without House Committee Approval
Trump said “they don’t know what the f**k they’re doing,” and Democrats are livid he didn’t clear it with the House first. A…
Trump Declares Ceasefire Between Israel and Iran, Blames Biden Just in Case
Trump announced a ceasefire between Israel and Iran on Truth Social, then immediately blamed Biden in case it fails. Neither country confirmed the…
Trump Says He’s Too Successful for a Third Term, Opts for Reality TV Glory Instead
Donald Trump says his second term has been so successful he won’t seek a third. Instead, he’s rebooting The Apprentice to fire people…
MAGA Claims Only They Can Legally Have Conspiracy Theories
After Trump’s shooting and airstrikes on Iran, MAGA declared itself the only group legally allowed to question anything, while everyone else got labeled…
Marjorie Taylor Greene Shocked to Discover President Can Drop Bombs Without Consulting Her Blog
Marjorie Taylor Greene lashed out after Trump bombed Iran without her permission, demanding peace, accountability, and possibly a return receipt.…
Terrified Gas Station Owners Slash Prices in Panic After Trump Says He’s “Watching”
After a Truth Social post warned “everyone” to keep oil prices down, gas station owners across America panicked, slashed prices, and hung up…
