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All the Latest in Lifestyle
Study Finds Americans Spend More Time Complaining About Daylight Saving Than It Saves
America’s longest running time war is not with the sun. It is with our group chats, our microwaves, and a Congress that can stall a second hand with pure indecision.
Man Proves Strangers Wrong Online, Forgets to Pick Up Kids from School
After a three-hour battle in a Facebook comment section, a man emerges victorious — and 47 minutes late to pick up his children. His wife calls it “his proudest loss yet.”
Nation’s Dogs Issue Joint Statement: ‘We Have No Idea What the Cats Are Planning’
The nation’s dogs have convened a canine intelligence coalition to address rising concern over “feline espionage.” So far, they have no leads—just fur.
Math Professor Confirms You’re More Likely to Be Mauled by a Bear Riding a Shark During a Lightning Storm Than Win Lottery
The Powerball jackpot is nearly a billion, but your odds of winning are lower than being mauled by a bear riding a shark. Statisticians confirm life is basically a cosmic prank show.
Tony Robbins Sues AI Clones for Offering Motivation Without Making You Walk on Fire
Tony Robbins is suing AI bots for offering motivation without a $3,000 seminar or mandatory fire walk, claiming emotional and financial theft.
Retired Man Now Begins Every Day by Fixing Something That Wasn’t Broken
Harold Menzies begins every day by fixing household items that aren't broken. His wife, Marlene, has started hiding tools in self-defense.
Local Man Refuses to Use Self-Checkout, Demands Human Eye Contact
A Midwestern man sparks a checkout standoff after demanding old-school cashier service, emotional validation, and sustained eye contact.
5 Key Signs You’ve Made It to the Lower-Middle Class
New research confirms you’ve officially made it to the lower-middle class if you own a Bluetooth air fryer and spend 17% of your income on flavored seltzers.
Elon Musk’s Family Tree Now Considered National Forest
Elon Musk’s sprawling family has reached federal recognition status, earning its own protected designation as a National Forest.
