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Politics Man Forgets Why He Walked Into Room, Becomes Mayor|Lifestyle Local Woman Claims Microwave Beep Is Passive-Aggressive|Family Area Dad Buys 14-Foot Ladder, Nothing Left to Prove|Health Surgeon General Warns Against Reheating Fish at Work|Business Pet Lizard Named Regional Sales Director in Restructuring|Entertainment Ghost Haunting Basement Just Lonely, Wants to Be in Book Club|Relationships “It’s Not You, It’s Mercury in Retrograde,” Says Breakup Text|Finance Toddler Declares Bankruptcy After Spree at Gumball Machine|Law Florida Man Wins Lawsuit Against Gravity|Tech Man Trapped in Group Text Since 2018, Sends Final SOS|Science AI Predicts Own Doom, Correctly Schedules HR Exit Interview|U.S. Emotional Support Squirrel Rejected by TSA, Starts Podcast|Work Woman on Zoom Call Wears Pajamas of Increasing Power|Education Conspiracy Theorist Discovers He’s Actually Just Bad at Puzzles|World Coffee Shop Declares Independence, Prints Own Currency| Politics Man Forgets Why He Walked Into Room, Becomes Mayor|Lifestyle Local Woman Claims Microwave Beep Is Passive-Aggressive|Family Area Dad Buys 14-Foot Ladder, Nothing Left to Prove|Health Surgeon General Warns Against Reheating Fish at Work|Business Pet Lizard Named Regional Sales Director in Restructuring|Entertainment Ghost Haunting Basement Just Lonely, Wants to Be in Book Club|Relationships “It’s Not You, It’s Mercury in Retrograde,” Says Breakup Text|Finance Toddler Declares Bankruptcy After Spree at Gumball Machine|Law Florida Man Wins Lawsuit Against Gravity|Tech Man Trapped in Group Text Since 2018, Sends Final SOS|Science AI Predicts Own Doom, Correctly Schedules HR Exit Interview|U.S. Emotional Support Squirrel Rejected by TSA, Starts Podcast|Work Woman on Zoom Call Wears Pajamas of Increasing Power|Education Conspiracy Theorist Discovers He’s Actually Just Bad at Puzzles|World Coffee Shop Declares Independence, Prints Own Currency|
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Law - Page 3

Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson Calls on Master Splinter and the TMNT to Help Curb City Violence

Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson has reached out to Master Splinter and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TMNT) to assist in curbing the violence…

Trump’s Bold New Defense: “I Tried to Off Pence During the Insurrection, But It’s Totally Legal!”

In a revelation that could only be described as the plot of a poorly written political thriller, it’s come to light that former…

Steve Bannon’s Press Conference Chaos: Cowbells, Chants, and Anarchy Princess

Steve Bannon’s turn-in to Danbury federal prison on Monday was a cacophony of chaos, complete with cowbells, chants, and the irrepressible Anarchy Princess.…

Donald Trump Requests Trial Venue Change to Judge Judy’s Court for ‘Fair’ Hearing

Washington D.C. – Former President Donald Trump’s legal team has submitted an extraordinary request to relocate his ongoing trial in the nation’s capital.…

Udder Madness: Ben & Jerry’s Cows File Moo-tion to Stop Milk Theft

Vermont – A group of disgruntled cows owned by the renowned ice cream company, Ben & Jerry’s, have filed a lawsuit against the…

Supreme Court Mandates Cross-Cultural Karen Training for Minorities

The United States Supreme Court has made an unexpected decision that requires white women to provide lessons on Karen-esque behavior to their minority…

‘The Simpsons’ Episodes Now Admissible in Court as Unassailable Crystal Balls

A landmark ruling by the Supreme Court has just declared that episodes of the long-running animated series, “The Simpsons,” are now irrefutable evidence…

Tom “My Shirt is Never” Fitton Replaces Trumps Top Lawyer on Legal Team

In an unprecedented move, former President Donald J. Trump has bid adieu to his team of high-powered lawyers and replaced them with a…

Trump Indictment Tour Set to Wow Audiences with Exquisite Legal Choreography

The Trump Indictment Tour of 2023 is hitting the road, bringing a unique blend of legal drama and political spectacle to a city…

McDonald’s Stops Serving Hot Food to Avoid More ‘Hot Food Debacles’, Introduces DIY Microwave Stations for Daring Diners

McDonald’s has revealed that it will no longer be serving hot food to customers following a string of lawsuits. The decision comes after…

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