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All the Latest in Law
Masked ICE Agents Raid Tamale Cart, Declare “War on Unauthorized Deliciousness”
ICE agents in riot gear raided a tamale vendor in Los Angeles, citing threats to national flavor integrity. Homeland Security called it “unauthorized street cuisine,” critics called it a hunger for power.
Mike Lindell Loses Defamation Case, Claims Verdict Was Counted by Dominion Machine
Mike Lindell was hit with a $2.3M defamation verdict. He claims the jury’s decision was rigged — possibly counted by the same machines he’s been yelling about since 2020.
Supreme Court Rules That Arguments at Family Gatherings Must Be Settled by Thumb War
The Supreme Court ruled that all family arguments must be settled with thumb wars, ushering in a new era of justice at American holiday tables.
Trump Privately Wonders if Supreme Court Nominations Came with Return Policy
President Trump is reportedly venting about his Supreme Court nominations, focusing his ire on Justice Amy Coney Barrett after rulings that didn’t match his expectations. White House aides say he’s explored “return options,”…
Second Court Blocks Trump’s Tariffs, Citing Law, Logic, and Lack of Emergency
A second federal court has blocked Donald Trump’s unilateral tariffs, ruling the IEEPA can’t be used just because Trump “feels like it’s a big deal.” Trump reportedly called the decision “treasonous and frankly…
White House Warns Americans: Calling Trump “T.A.C.O.” Could Get You Arrested
White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt warned that referring to Donald Trump as “T.A.C.O.”, Trump Always Chickens Out, may lead to criminal charges. Critics say this is the pettiest First Amendment crisis ever.
Trump Says He’ll ‘Take a Look’ at Pardoning Men Who Took a Look at Kidnapping Governor
President Trump raised eyebrows again by saying he’ll “take a look” at pardoning the men convicted of plotting to kidnap Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer, calling them “very passionate patriots.”
Texas Lawmakers Heroically Protect Teens From TikTok, Not Guns or Heatstroke
Texas wants to ban kids from using social media to protect their brains. Guns, heat, and existential dread remain perfectly legal.
Texas Moves to Ban THC Gummies, Vapes, and Anything That Makes You Feel Slightly Happy
Texas plans to ban all THC products by September, because gummies are the real threat, not property taxes or a functioning electrical grid.
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