US National Debt Outperforms Dow Jones and S&P 500
The US national debt has surpassed both the Dow Jones and the S&P 500 for consistent returns, leaving investors jealous and Congress eager…
The Penny Faces Retirement, Will Spend Golden Years Under Car Seats and in That One Drawer Everyone Has
As the U.S. stops making pennies, 114 billion of them prepare for retirement in junk drawers and the dark corners of society.…
Treasury Secretary Announces Support for Digital Assets Right After Monetizing Trump’s Meme Coin
Treasury Secretary says Trump is “going big” on digital assets, right after Trump threw a gala for people who bought his meme coin.…
Kid Declares Bankruptcy After Spree at Gum ball Machine, Demands Federal Bailout in Quarters
Kid burns through savings on gum balls, files bankruptcy in crayon, now seeking bailout in coins and cuddles.…
Robert Kiyosaki Declares Financial Armageddon for the 97th Time
Robert Kiyosaki has declared the end of the economy again, this time because the Fed bought bonds and didn’t invite him. Gold, silver,…
Dave Ramsey Regrets Nothing About Calling Bitcoin Buyers “Stupid” in 2014, Still Thinks Being Rich Is Morally Suspicious
Dave Ramsey called Bitcoin buyers “stupid” in 2014. Bitcoin surged. He says that doesn’t change the math or his devotion to envelopes and…
Donald Trump Launches S.C.A.M. Silver Coins: Surefire Cash Acquisition Mechanism for the Loyal MAGA Crowd
Former President Donald Trump has announced the launch of his own cryptocurrency: S.C.A.M. Coin, or the Surefire Cash Acquisition Mechanism. Marketed as “the coin that…
Politicians Flood Social Media with Happy Labor Day Posts While Ignoring Minimum Wage Stagnation Since 2009
As Americans celebrated Labor Day, social media was flooded with posts from politicians wishing their constituents a happy holiday. While these messages aimed…
Kamala Harris Promises to Launch ‘Price Force’ to Combat Price Gouging
Vice President Kamala Harris has announced a bold new initiative: the creation of “Price Force,” a team dedicated to combating price gouging. During…
San Francisco 4-Person Tent Housing Drops Below $500,000 Amidst Crime and Drug Epidemic
San Francisco, CA — The once-elusive dream of owning a 4-person tent in the heart of San Francisco has become slightly more attainable…
