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Education

California School Sends Student Home for Wearing Cross Necklace, Cites ‘Cross Contamination’

A California elementary school in the city of Los Angeles has sent a student home for wearing a cross necklace, citing concerns that it may offend non-Christian students in the school. According to…

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State of Texas Declares Pi Equals 3.00 Based on Biblical Interpretation

Everything’s bigger in Texas — except now, apparently, the circumference of a circle.…

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Trump Announces New Policy: Mandatory MAGA Hats in All Schools to Boost National Pride

The former president claims red hats will "Make America Smart Again," one student at a time.…

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Supreme Court Blocks Biden-Harris Plan to Use Taxpayer Dollars for Student Loans, Citing Funds Are for Millionaires and Billionaires Only

The U.S. Supreme Court has recently made a pivotal decision. They’ve blocked the Biden-Harris administration’s proposal to forgive student loans with taxpayer funds. The court argued that these funds are meant for the…

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Childless Cat Ladies Mock Back-to-School Social Media Posts, Sparking Outrage from J.D. Vance

As parents across the nation flood social media with celebratory back-to-school posts, one unexpected group has emerged to rain on their parade: childless cat ladies. These feline enthusiasts have taken to mocking the…

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Cafeteria Worker Sentenced to 9 Years for Stealing $1.5 Million Worth of Chicken Wings for Ultimate Block Party

A cafeteria worker in Illinois has been sentenced to 9 years in prison after being convicted of stealing $1.5 million worth of chicken wings from a local school district. The worker, whose identity…

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Chaos Ensues as Students Attempt to Locate Lost Pencils on First Day of School

Chaos erupted across the nation today as students embarked on their much-anticipated first day of school. The cause of the turmoil? Lost pencils. Reports from schools coast to coast reveal that an alarming…

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Supreme Court: Students Must Now Prove They’re Descendants of Ancient Philosophers

Washington D.C. – The Supreme Court of the United States dealt a devastating blow to affirmative action in college admissions. In a 5-4 decision, the highest court in the land declared that race-based…

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Texas Enforces Mandatory Ten Commandments Movie Screenings for Students: “Thou Shalt Watch…Forever!”

Austin, TX – In a stunning display of reverence for the divine, Texas lawmakers have recently passed a groundbreaking law that mandates all students in public schools to watch the timeless cinematic masterpiece,…

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Georgia Officials Propose Rewriting History Books to Feature Confederate Soldiers as True Heroes

Atlanta, Georgia – In a stunning move that has left historians scratching their heads, elected officials in Georgia have put forth a controversial proposal to rewrite all history books used in the state’s…

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Lauren Boebert Proposes Making AR-15 the National Gun, Also Wants Bulletproof Backpacks to be the New ‘It’ Fashion for School Kids

Washington D.C. – In a surprising move, Representative Lauren Boebert (R-CO) has introduced a new bill that would make the AR-15 style rifle the “National Gun of the United States.” But that’s not…

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